I have some serious catching up to do! I guess I'll just dig in. First, I really don't think that I have an addictive personality. I honestly don't think that I am a workaholic, shopaholic, alcoholic or that I'm money, sex, anything else obsessed. Maybe I'm deluding myself but I feel like I've got things pretty much in check, with the exception of the food thing. Maybe food really is my vice...interesting.
Now, something that I can converse effortlessly about is the relationship that I have with my family members. I guess the most important thing to say here is that I feel (to me at least) that I am one of the luckiest people in the world when it comes to family. Even considering that I come from a 'broken' and doubly 'rebuilt' home I feel that I have a very stable family life. My mom, brother and sister are the 3 most important people in my life and I love them more that I can say. I would lay my life down for any of them. My parent's divorced when I was 4, Karla was 5 and Cody was 2. For 10 years it was the three of us looking out for and taking care of each other. We all had to grow up very quickly (I could do laundry, any household chore and cook a meal by the time I was in 1st grade), a fact that haunts my mother still today, but none of us kids would change. And while we are still siblings and mother and child, at the end of the day we are the best of friends. There is nothing that we can't and don't talk about. At times that can be scary but it really is an amazing thing. My mom is my guide post for everything I do. The worst thing in the world I could ever imagine doing is disappointing her, I won't EVER let that happen. My brother and sister are my best friends and I never have to be anything but myself for them. I never have to apologize for being bitchy, moody, insane, or just down right mean (hey we all have our moments) and its the same for them and me. I could keep going on and on but I think you get the idea.
My relationship with my dad and step-mom is a little different. At times we get along really well but there is always this air of us never being good enough for them. I'm sure that we read too much into it but it seems like they have their life with her girls and we're the family member's they pull out for the holidays. Maybe that's not fair to say but it's how I feel. I do not doubt for a moment that my dad loves me but sometimes it's hard not wonder. I know I'm not totally blameless in this relationship but I'm not to blame entirely either. It honestly makes me very sad that I don't have as good of a relationship with my dad as my mom. It physically hurts me to admit (and I've never told anybody but my sister this before) that I love my mom more than my dad, again it doesn't mean that I don't love my dad with all my heart, it's just not that same relationship that I have with my mom.
As far as the rest of my siblings go I get along with the rest of them. They're all crazy in their own unique ways but we all are. There are times when I want to murder them or just smack them probably but again, we're siblings...it's going to happen. I love my sister-in-law and my nieces and nephews are simply adorable.
I get along very well the the grandparents. I was so, so, SO lucky as a kid to be raised near both sets of my grandparents. I can talk to my dads folks with ease...even now. They are so supportive and love all of us so much. Their only complaint is that we don't call enough...I feel bad about that. Sadly my mom's parents are gone but they really taught us everything we know about family. It says something pretty special about a man and woman who can move their family from Europe to America with only 2 suitcases and build a legacy that keeps growing to this day. I am the furthest person from home and there are hundreds of us. We still get together for every major holiday and just for the hell of it all the time (even without the grandparents). I can easily converse and enjoy the company of any of my aunts, uncles, cousins, cousins' kids etc. I really think what we have is so very special. We know that no matter what, the whole family is there for us. You pick on one of us, you deal with all of us. It's a great feeling. Having said that, my dad's side of the family...not so much. My dad and his sister barely speak to one another and when they do it's not full of love. I barely see my cousin's on that side and quite frankly, that doesn't bother me. Besides my grandparents, nobody on that side of the family is very family oriented so we just never had the opportunity to be close. It's kind of sad when you compare it to the other side of my family.
When all is said and done, I am a very lucky girl. I think I commented on all of the family relationships I was supposed to...if not I'll try to at a later date. I was going to talk about my friends here also but I think I'll take Jenny's direction and just do another entry...keep things easier that way!
2 comments:
No worries, I unconsciously and consciously compare the two sides of my family. It's the same for me (and Jenny, unless she disagrees) that our mom's side is more friendly, loving, and family-oriented. I always feel comfortable around them. On the other hand, our dad's side of the family doesn't mesh as well. Not everyone likes everyone else. In a way they began to treat Jenny and I differently because we were going to college whereas most of our cousins didn't. They thought we were uppity. Not all of my dad's side is like that but at family gatherings there's a small air of tension, not the friendly and loving environment with my mom's side. It's hard to ignore and not compare. I think the siblings relationship is definitely similar for Jenny and I too. I'll let her make her own comment though. Good to hear you're not obsessed with sex, lol. Just had to make that comment. :)
Excellent points LeAnn...our family (Smith side) has been rather weird ever since we went on to college.
And sex rules....obsession or not.
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