Eating out and resisting the beloved cheeseballs

So today in Independence, after getting good news about my car, my parents wanted to eat at local diner. I was actually hungry so I decided to join them. They wanted to discuss some things anyway. I really want to only eat out once a week but oh well, it's not actually a set goal just a preference. Well it was somewhat difficult because the diner had good stuff like bread cheeseballs and other fatty foods. I stayed true though and got a chicken breast sandwich (unbreaded) with all the veggies on it. I put a little ranch dressing on it since I don't like mayo. I ate a few of my mom's breaded mushrooms and resisted the wonderful cheeseballs that I adore. The chicken sandwich alone did really fill me up. I guess the true test will be if I can resist cheeseballs at Hickory Park. I'm pretty sure we'll eat there again in the next month. I can't believe how well I'm listening to my hunger. Let's hope my ability to listen like this holds out for a long time. I'm waiting for a stressful moment to hit though. Alrighty, enough rambling for now.

Expanding on Jenny's thoughts...

I am really glad that your last post was what it was. I've been noticing some things in myself over these last few weeks...things that I'm sure I've noted in the past but are standing out more to me this time around. I love the scale from 0-5 to describe hunger. I think assessing my hunger and fullness are two of the biggest tasks that I face. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that mose overeaters face this struggle. As overeaters we have become acustomed to the feelings of being overly full. The unpleasant tension in the stomach...the bloated feeling that leave us in a position to do nothing more than unbutton our pants and lay on the floor (ok, that's a bit dramatic but I'm sure we've all been there more than once). My issue right now is that unless I feel this miserable feeling, I don't stop eating. That's a problem. I know that I don't need to feel stuffed and miserable to be full but it's like my mental hunger isn't satiated until I feel like death. I would really like to fix this. It's funny because losing weight isn't just about dieting or exercise. It's about completely relearning how we've approached food and fitness our entire lives (well, at least my entire life). This really is a learning process!

Also, last week sucked. I have no excuse. I simply lacked the self-control to make myself behave...I WILL do better this week!

So, onto the goals:
-get back to eating out only once per week (last week was bad and I felt like crap because of it!)
-keep up with 15 minutes of exercise each day
-cut all of my food portions in half...eat it slowly
-eat only when physiologically hungry (for this one week absolutely no head-hunger snacking...I have to do this to prove to myself that I can)

So am I really hungry?

I have to admit the Weight Watcher's thing is really helping me think about whether or not I'm actually hungry. As mentioned in the past (I think), a lot of my hunger is mental. I'm hungry when I'm bored, doing tedious work, lonely, or just blah. Well the Weight Watcher's program gives a scale for hunger. Basically it goes like this:

0 = very hungry, ravenous
1= hungry
2= A bit hungry
3= Satisfied/comfortable
4= Not at all hungry/full
5= Stuffed

Basically a person's comfort zone is around 2-3. I know this is a "duh" thing but in the past, even last week, I'd eat until I was at 5. I've been slowing down when I eat the last few days and really evaluating if I'm hungry or not. Usually I'm not that hungry. It's not been difficult to use my points and feel satisfied. So Nicole was right, slowing down when you eat is wise. Very wise. You'd think I'd realize that eating til I'm stuffed sucks but I've obviously been doing that for awhile. Especially when I go out to eat. For some reason I think it's wrong to bring home food from restaurants. I think it's not going to taste as good when I reheat it or something. I always try to eat it all when I'm there and end up feeling miserable the rest of the night. Let's hope I think more with my physiological signals than my eyes when I go out to eat next.

From the mind of Jenny....

I don't have enough time to start any actual work before I leave my apartment so I thought I'd make some remarks about my eating behavior. So I had a "last supper" occurrence last night. The "last supper" phenomenon pertains to a large meal, usually of favorite foods, that you eat prior to starting a diet or lifestyle change. Since I started counting my points today, I ate a little too much last night. Ok, I ate way too much last night. I grabbed some of my potato soup from the Hy-Vee deli and also ate a huge salad. I also snacked on some licorice taffy.

I've noticed a common occurrence most nights. Usually when I reach my "no eating" time at night (8:30ish pm) I have a mental battle with eating. I'm not physically hungry at this time but I have the need to keep eating. I find myself saying "Oh screw it, just eat something tonight and start over with the goal in the on the next day". And yes, last week I gave into that line of thinking a lot. It's a horrible vicious cycle. I need to go back to the library and get a book to read at night. I didn't actually read "Angels and Demons" because I got really busy the week I borrowed it. I also sit by the computer A LOT chatting at night and tend to snack then too. Quite frankly I need to make a rule that I cannot eat by the computer. If you saw my keyboard you'd be horrified because it's so dirty from spilled food and drink. I'm surprised it still works sometimes. I really hope all these areas of my life start to click now that I started Weight Watchers.

I did it....

Ok, this is Jenny. I went to a Weight Watcher's meeting today and got all signed up. I'm doing their monthly pass program so I'll be shelling out $40 a month (not including food if I chose to buy that). Thanks to my inability to read I missed the 10am meeting. I swear to god it said 11am the other day so I was planning to go at 11am. Luckily they offer a meeting at 12:15pm so I went to that instead. I like the leader for the most part. They are always so damn perky though. I understand its necessary for the job but come on...it gets a little old. My officially weight today is 282 lbs. I'm going to do their flex plan which means I basically get so many points and have to use them all each day. I get an extra 35 to play with during the week for treats and stuff. I get 37 points a day. It seems like a lot because in the past when I've done Weight Watchers, I've obviously been lighter and started with a lower amount.

I got a good recipe from the meeting for a dessert. My friend Marie told me about this too and I've wanted to try it for months. You simply buy a box of low-fat brownie mix. If you buy regular mix, it won't be so healthy. Instead of adding the usual egg and oil, you only add black beans. You puree a can of black beans and they make up for the liquid ingredients. The brownies taste exactly the same! I had them earlier this year. Since they have so much fiber, they also fill you up faster and you don't binge on them. And if you do binge on them, you'll regret eating all that fiber the next day.

Due to Weight Watcher's I'll be able to report my weight on a weekly basis. Hopefully checking in with Weight Watcher's will keep me in check. I have habit of losing 10-20 pounds and falling off the wagon because I don't think I need the program's help anymore. Well obviously my gut and butt indicate that I do need their help for a longer period of time.

Time for my lazy ass to write something...

Well...things haven't been horrible. But they haven't been great. The last two days have been filled with lathargy and low motivation. I've done well with eating though. After Gavin's football game, we went out to eat to good 'ol Hickory Park and that will be our "eating out" experience for the week. I really need to get my behind to Weight Watcher's this week too. I see no reason why I won't attend on Thursday since I'm hell bent on attending the meetings at 11am Thursdays.

I'm really sick of feeling so run down. I know if I continue to fix my eating habits and if I EXERCISE regularly, I won't feel so crappy. My sleep habits suck too. I have a very difficult time falling asleep around 10pm when normal people go to sleep. Even if I don't nap during the day or early evening, I still struggle going to sleep at a suitable time. It's driving me nuts.

Ok, enough complaining. Time for some goals.

1) Once again I do not want to eat after 8:30pm. I have to move it back half an hour because Gavin and I get home late sometimes from activities or events in the area. I fudged on this goal a couple times last week because of late arrivals home.

2) I need to weigh myself once a week on a non-sucky scale. The one in my apartment is not very accurate so I'll use one at my place of employment.

3) I need to work in an extra 90 minutes of exercise each week. Ideally, I'd like to work out for 30 minute bouts 3 times a week or more. Really wish I had someone to play tennis with.

The Results...

So, after spending a few days journaling about my eating habits I have come to a few conclusions.

A) I eat way to quickly. I tend to overreat and don't even know it at the time. I finish and feel fine and then suddenly 10 minutes later feel like a stuffed pig...not a good feeling.
B) I do love foods that are bad for me...we all do.
c) I am such a bored eater. I don't snack during the day...even if I have food at work to munch on I don't tend to do so. I do, however, snack unrelentlessly at night and all weekend long...this is a problem (mostly because I have no friends in Michigan and am basically bored all my waking hours).

To be honest I'm not really surprised by these revelations, although I will admit that I didn't realize how bad the boredom issue was until I started logging what was going in my mouth. Now that I know this I am going to have to find a way to preoccupy myself. I think that I am going to apply for a part time job at Lanebryant and if I get that I hope that it will help. It will at least get me out of the apartment which means less sitting on my rear doing nothing but giving it some more cushioning. I also noted that I got crap for exercise while I was journaling so I'll have to do something about that as well.

So, after taking all of this into consideration I have added to my goal list:
-eat out only once per week
-get at least 15 minutes of exercise EVERY day ( I know it's not a lot but it's a starting point)!

I hope you all had more success this weekend than I...let me know what's up!

-nicole